Just a recap for the last few days.

Didn't play a whole lot b/c of memorial day activities. Had a great time, but still not doing so hot at the tables. Have dropped another 1k or so. The thing is, I feel like I'm in a good mindset, confident and positive, and playing well most of the time, though I have definitely tilted off a few buyins. Maybe this goes back to my FPS somewhat. Maybe I need to do a couple of sweat sessions maybe. I'm sure I will work it out and work through it though and am confident I will reach my goal, though it has been more than a rocky start to say the least.

Days 4-9: -1,000

Running Total: -1646.30

I Need: 31,646,30

One thought just crossed my head that maybe keeping track like this is a bad idea because it almost forces me to be results oriented. But, on the other hand, it gives me a concrete goal to work towards that I know if I make the right decisions along the way I should be able to reach. I'll think some more on this.

So I didn't play any poker yesterday b/c we went to Houston for the astros/cubs game and had a blast. Stayed with a friend and came back today. Instead of playing cash today I satellited in to the 1k main event satellite on full tilt. Started with 74 players i think and gave 6 seats and 7th paid 2k. I tried (probably, and most likely) a bad re-steal over an aggro player with A4o in the sb after he opened on the btn and he had AQ and i busted. Was really pissed at myself/disappointed/numb but I don't really know what to think. I think I may still get a seat but I wonder if this will mess up my head for a while. Making a mistake that close to a WSOP seat really pisses me off, and I'm pretty sure it was a mistake. I guess all I can say is oh well and move on from there. Not gonna count the satellite money today as I'm just focused on making 30k in cash games really.

On another note, I tried a bank transfer from ftp today, and I hope they've got their shit straightened out after all the delays they were having. I really would like to have the money in less than a month I guess that's all for now though. I will probably try to put in a cash session in the morning before our friends show up for memorial day weekend.

CASH: +227.05

After a brief 6 tabling stint this morning where I dropped about 2.5 buyins, i spent the rest of the day battling back to end up booking just over a buyin win on the day.

I definitely made some good, almost hero type calls that worked out and ran a couple of good bluffs, but I still think I leak chips sometimes falling into FPS. Gotta work on that.

Also, played a little later than I had said I would, but I got a nap earlier this afternoon and was awake enough to play later on and didn't play while laying in bed so I think all is well with that decision.

I really really really need to go get a new laptop soon so I can put holdem manager on it and start posting some interesting hands. Until tomorrow....

CASH GAMES: -873.35

Took my "one last shot at 2/4" for a while and it didn't go well. Said I'd quit after being down 2 buyins, but I was down that quick to 2 not great HU players in my estimation so I kept playing for a while and got worked a little. Definitely couldn't have been in the best state of mind and was really disappointed in myself for dropping about 1800 to start the day.

After being disappointed in myself, I had dinner with my fiance, had a beer, took the dogs out for a little, then watched some tuff fish videos and felt a lot better, so I decided to start my journey at 1/2 and stick with it for a while. I 4 tabled 1/2 6max for a couple of hours and won about 900 back, obv a good result. I feel better mentally, the money definitely affects me less, and the competition is definitely weaker. This all adds up to a good start toward my 30k goal, even though I'm starting off 900 in the hole. I know I'm going to get there though. Still playing on my fiance's laptop, but plan on buying a new one this week, then I'll buy holdem manager and then I can start posting some of the more interesting hands w/ daily updates. I think this will also help me review my play and keep me sharp. Until tomorrow.

I figured keeping up with this blog would be the best way to keep me on track and keep me focused. My goal is to make 30k by the end of August. Hopefully, this shouldn't be too big of a task, but one I really want/need to accomplish. I've also been thinking the last couple of days that I need to set up some rules and try to be a lot more disciplined about things if I will accomplish this goal. For example, I think I need to stop playing late at night while laying in bed, as I've had significant losing sessions doing that lately. So with that in mind here are some guidelines/rules/goals. Hopefully, having them here will keep me more focused.

Maybe try 2/4 for a little longer, but if I drop 2 more buyins, drop to 1-2 for about a week or until the end of May.

From now, or after a 1-2 stint, only play 2/4 until I reach 30k online, then I can start trying 3/6. This applies to both HU and 6max. Maybe start taking HU shots at 25k, and maybe start incorporating 1 table of 3/6 or so into 6max, but very very hesitantly.

Play 4-6 tables of 6max and 2-3, max of 4 HU.

Don't play late at night and/or while laying in bed.

Be more disciplined about making "good quits," in both winning and losing sessions, especially when I don't feel on top of my game, even if I think my image would allow me to take advantage of a situation.

Try to play more straight forward most of the time and avoid FPS.

Spend more time doing session review/analysis, and going back and watching at least 1 video every day or at worst every other day.

Alright, if I come up with anymore later, I'll add them and may even print off some of these and put by my computer. I'll try to enter results most days. 30k, here we come.