Who the fuck is co stompe i hear you cry?????

well lads and ladies he's a dart player from Holland, who has just been bent over and pumped to within an inch of his darting life by Phil Taylor ,a 5-0 whitewash on sky sports in the world darts championships quarter finals.So what?? an obviously shite performance by a pretty pish player in a game most of you guys don't give a flying fuck about, big deal.

now you see to me it kinda has become a wee poignant deal that i want to share with anybody who reads the pish i spout out in this blog.Co stompe is not a pish player,far from it, Phil Taylor just played like a fuckin demon and there was just nothing he could do .But that leads me onto the point I'm trying to make in my gommy weird way.

it was the way he played the match, and by that I'm specifically referring to his demeanor and attitude which was the same as it always seems to be whenever he plays or is interviewed. He constantly smiles, he really seems to enjoy himself, he treats everyone he meets with a warm cheery style that just draws you to the man...Even when he was getting beefed right up the arse 5-0 with a distinct lack of warning, permission and lubricant, he never lost this light hearted cheery approach right to the bitter end

now i get slaughtered by the bird and the lads in work when i refer to poker as a "sport".Insults like "its a game of cards fanny", and "its all luck anyway where's the sport in that" are used with regularity. But to be honest the sportsmanship I've experienced and enjoyed, even cherished not to sound too gay and emotional with all the sports I've played throughout my life is non existent with this game we play it would seem.

Starting right at the top of the measuring scale you get the wydo, forcefully aggressive foul mouthed abuse chucked at you by the irritating wee fannies (usually referring to my maw or my sexuality it seems) who just because they're safe in their anonymous wee houses feel they can dish out the attitude like AL Pacino in Scarface. This is the reason i have a hole in my wall next to the computer. I realize violence doesn't solve anything and that the abusers are probably specky 16 year olds who's baws haven't even dropped yet but still, if a fuckin genie came out a bottle and granted me even just one wish, see at that moment in the heat of the exchange, world peace...forget it...riches beyond my wildest dreams...bollocks to that...a cock the size of Gibraltar...don't need it...i would wish to be transported to the rooms of these wee fuckers. crazy...yes...but delicious...ohhhh

Then as we move down the scale, now moving into live play, its all a bit tamer face to face and a bit more civil that the barbaric nature of on line chat , but again its either simple distaste for other players, an underlining mild hatred of these "enemies " when they suck out or catch cards, or simple ignorant lack of acknowledgment that anyone else is at the table. I by the way place myself for the most part in this category, not where I'm proud to be i can tell you

I don't know if its because luck and bad beats does inevitably is a factor in the outcomes, or if its just simply because money is involved but these guys like co stompe are rare gems in this world of card playing.

I was impressed by this man tonight, and i believe that if i take a leaf out of his book, and try to capture even just a small fraction of his love of just playing the game or the warmth, humility and lack of "need and desire to win at all costs" he displayed, i can be a much better poker player, a much more successful poker player, a much better man and simply be a fucking lot happier while i do it.

right back to the sng's

Pb

there is a saying in the west of Scotland that is used to describe life and that is the phrase

"peaks and troughs son, life's simply just a series of peaks and troughs"

well my life at the virtual tables has just been a cluster-fuck volley of troughs upon troughs these past few days playing heads up PLO and nl hold em. Runner runner straights,runner runner backdoor flushes, hitting 4 outers on the river, i have no doubt my play could be questioned in spots but Jesus i might as well of had a ball in my mouth and a dog collar and lead round ma neck because I'm definitely some body's gimp bitch. My bankroll has took a beasting!!!

So here we go again as i try to get my head around the luck factor that is present in the game i love. Honestly fuck game theory, starting hands, positional play, pot control, range application etc....this is it..this is what it all boils down to.....this is the one aspect of the game as far as I'm concerned if i don't get, then the rest of it is just padding , fluff and a one way ticket leading straight to pishunhappycardplayerville.

So how do we get a handle on this poisonous piece of the game,this part of the game that's resulted in huge mood swings, a hole in my wall next to the computer...and even resulted in me responding to this question from the bird in ma bed after a bad session ..."do you want me to dress up for you Pb" with the answer "na its alright hen "

I woke up screaming in the morning disgusted with myself after that corker i can tell you...i could have spewed seriously!!!

Sirneb posted this wee gem the forum that addressed this wee conundrum when trevrob posted about running really bad and how to deal with it

"The quicker you realize that the reason you are experiencing bad beats is because you wrongfully perceive them as bad beats. There are no such thing as bad beats. Bad beats are what one EXPECTS as a negative outcome. For someone who is trying to burn money, winning a pot and sucking out is perceived as a bad beat for him.

The best way to approach the game or actually just life in general is to NOT expect. An outcome is a result of your decision, nothing more, nothing less. Sometimes it's bitter, sometimes it's sweet but it's just an outcome. If you had played your best, and somehow you still end up busto, then that's the outcome. But at least you look back, you had tried and had done your best. But I can guarantee that if you had not done just that, you would have a even worse outcome.

The sooner you can realize all you can do is make the best decision you possibly can, and the outcome has never been in your control. You'll realize losing many many pots due to bad beats is not as big of a deal as you think. And having this false perception to EXPECT is a huge flaw to your thinking. If you can let it go, this burden that's been on your chest will inevitably be lifted."

Did i get what i wanted???

Was it what i expected to happen???

shite he's sucked out !!!!!

BASTARDS I SAY BASTARDS!!!!!!

that's the problem right there my friends!!!

Its the expectation that's causing the tilt and the unhappiness i feel when i lose...because i expected to win when the cards were turned over and i was ahead. Even if I'm a 90% favorite...there is still the shitty 10 % there that will result in lose for ur old papa.

focus on the decisions Pauly boy and measure your results by that....what happens on the turn or the river is for the masses of angry "unlucky" loosing players to focus on.


so I'm going to go back to nl hold em 6 max sng tables to see if i can recover a bit of stability in the bankroll department, and try and not be a moody emotional self absorbed helmet while I'm there lol

Pb

current bankroll $55..up $10 from last blog

Porsche boxter is on standby for order ....

starting to pick up a bit of pace on the heads up PLO sng tables on stars, thank fuck as the beastin i was taking was starting to make me question my sexuality, but again on a few occasions i noticed i slipped into calling way too light opp, chasing draws and falling in love with big pairs pre flop ..basically playing like a fan dan again????

Its a basic fact in my experience that the greatest gains in most things in your life are the little changes....and keeping these little changes going without reverting back to the old habits. Get the small things right and watch how much better things turn out

the simple changes I'm making to my game from watching Brian, stinger and Andrews leak-finder series are really starting to help, but i find it so hard to get the consistency in place..that's a big challenge poker offers me, and its a challenge i fail on daily. But the battle continues and i just need to really be conscious of this more.


have you ever heard of this

its day 4 of the Xmas holiday here in el scotia and i feel myself falling into the same old routine that i have followed for the last 2 years, and its quite a destructive one.
I lecture to pay the bills and support the love of my life in her quest to build up her own theater company, a benefit of which is i get the same holidays as the schools. The downside is the constant battle trying to resist the urge to attach a pipe to the exhaust of the mota, roll the windows up and take a trip to a much more peaceful place where money, pressure, exams and the rat race don't feature. i get great holidays.

i start these holidays with intentions, unattainable, full of shit, not a hope in hell chance of full filling intentions, but end up just getting lost in the battle to start playng successful poker and the natural ability i have to fill up a day doing nothing really significant, while being as happy as a pig in shite. This one is so far no different.

i make lists you see

To be honest i make lots of lists. Every time i shop at the local tesco i by a new fuckin pad and pen to begin a new pad with lists. These lists list (stay with me )what i want to achieve for the day, week month, life etc and how exactly I'm going to do it.

these lists torment the fuck out of me, because they seem so simple to work through, but alas just highlight how quickly i move on to the next thing that comes up in ma noisy noisy mind


Now of course poker does not escape my list fetish

Ive tried listing how i lost the game every time i lose, I've tried listing the lessons i learn from watching the training vids from all the cardrunner boys

I LIST EVERYTHING!!!!

why?

well to try and learn and improve through experience and reflection is my thinking, but there is a few main problems, and believe me they're biggies


1) i am a man of taking rather than doing (llazy bastard not able to follow through with effort)
2) I seem to get into an intense rut and just keep doing the same activity until someone or something snaps me out of it (not healthy no matter what the activity is, period)
3) I do things my way and if its not working out i just keep doing it until it does or i chuck it and go in a huff (this is the part I'm blaming my mum for asi was spoiled as a kid obviously)
4) The lessons i learn through this reflection fade away quickly and i fall into making the same old mistakes over and over (I'm not a stupid lad but somethings definitely not right up there)


Now apart from being huge handicap in life, they are as you can easily decipher disastrous in poker.

So in the constant battle for change, i have been playing little bursts of sng heads up pot limit Omaha today, and its going a bit better than yesterday, and here's why

-Beginning to understand that at the micro levels no one folds pre flop, so don't have a hard on for raising in position then c betting the flop.The flop makes your hand in Omaha, so be patient, fold anything that's weak, don't chase, and play it hard, but only with great draws.

- Never getting all the money in pre flop with aces even if they are suited....getting outdrawn every fucking time it feels

-loving the fact that i had pokerstars take my chat privileges away..makes life so much simpler than getting involved in a chat spat with the fannies.....winds me up to nuclear levels needing straight jackets to prevent injury to surrounding objects and living creatures.


right back to the world championship of darts on sky...come on the power!!!!

coi

ps blanton, cheers for the reply. To answer no i don't really that's a bloody good point. I do read the psychology stuff on the forums here and on 2 plus 2 alot to try and keep me on the right side of the thinking game, but i don't really go through a set routine before a game...any recommendations would be welcomed

what i do find is that I'm usually fine until the first race lost or bad beat..then it gets harder as i begin to react emotionally...then i really need to work on talking myself into the right mindset again.

I get baw humped. Alot.

If you are not from the west coast of Scotland let me expand on the meaning of this well used phrase, it means
"pumped, rode, done over, screwed, destroyed, slapped about, embarrassingly beaten"

Whether it be No limit or pot limit Omaha, which I'm right in the middle of making a complete arse of right now under the guise of "just finding ma feet" i really do take it tight.

My other half has bore witness to this daily occurrence for probably about close to 2 years now and to be fair on the poor girl my reactions to my inevitable losing don't bode well on the "even though its 8 years and I'm puttin on the beef, I'm still the king with some quality patter and a bit of life left in me yet luv, ps. don't leave me and take the cats with you" campaign.

I follow a regular routine when i lose:

1) A moment of complete stillness (the silence before the storm)
2) Irregular bouts of heavy breathing in and out (totally involuntary i can assure you)
3) The creation of lots of weird and random sounds indicating confusion af disbelief (starts to get worrying now)
4) The expression of anger and frustration in the harshest forms of the scottish dialect (my mum would disown me if she heard)
5) A stroll into the kitchen to look out the window and find resolve to arrest complete breakdown (even the cats are laughing at me by now)

I am a fanny in a lot of ways, and by fanny to the Americans out there i mean ass hole. Unmistakably and without question. A basically good guy with the usual make up of strengths and weaknesses trying to get by and improve on some of these as he goes along.

The problem seems to be that poker doesn't just exposes every single one of these flaws, it shines the spotlight on them and broadcasts them in full hd quality picture to the masses, and my day to day challenge to get good at this is a simple battle against everything that is bad about my personality.


how fuckin deep is that lol


The simple result of all this deep pap is that i'm pish, totally pish. Still at micro limits. Bankroll currently sitting at $43

so here it is at the prompting of the girlfriend, my first blog.

If i can relate my experiences of getting to grips with this beautiful game, it might be funny to some, might be familiar, might be entertaining and in some way beneficial i don't really know but i do know this: we all struggle in our own way so if i keep it honest and put it in my own unique way it wont be like any other blog and i actually think it ill help me focus my thought more by writing them down and maybe speed up the process of getting better, getting out the bloody micro stakes and hopefully cut down on the baw humping.

pb