I can't believe the end of this trip is almost here. In a way, I'm glad because I know my time I needed here is over. I'm staying at a beautiful beach resort in a small fan bungalow enjoying my last 1-2 weeks here by doing my own thing. I guess it's symbolic that I'm ready to head back and see where I can go on my own. When I first arrived in Thailand I was unsure of a lot of things, and not so much scared about 3 months here on my own, but just wondering if this is what I needed. I believe it was, but with where I'm at now, I want to get back to Chicago and really see what I'm made of. It's funny that I came here to see what I was made of and who I am, but really, it's once I'm back that I can truly understand these points further.

I've really pushed myself physically and mentally while here, ultimately reaching my "goals" but still allowing some space for myself for improvement. I suppose it's a lifelong process to continually improve and always try to be your best, at whatever it is you choose to do. I can say I reached my goals here, but in the greater scheme of things, they're just stepping stones towards a future that's yet to be determined. Physically I've pushed myself to the point of exhaustion, sickness and injury on a few occasions, overall losing about 15 pounds. But there's still more to do once I'm back and I realized that 3 months is not enough time for my personal goal. However, it's a patient process and what's the rush? As long as I'm improving, that's what's important.

And mentally I've had to deal with my inner demons just like most people do every day. And I don't have the answers to all the questions I had, but again, I have a clearer picture and as long as I continue to work on it, that's all I can ask of myself. I set a goal of 40 books as well as reading online articles, listening to podcasts, watching videos and shows even that could give me insights and enlightenment as to what this is all about (life, not the trip) as well as anything that could help me along the way. Currently I'm on book #34 and after everything I've seen online, I've realized there's such a plethora of information available and while it can seem overwhelming for everything I want to learn and know about, I have time to continuing to improve in this area too. I mean, if you don't count books for school or books about poker, I've read more books in these 3 months than probably the last 10 years of my life. That needs to change. But that's why I'm here.

I'm starting to lose focus here. I guess what I've come to realize about this whole trip was that I did needed a change and this trip served as the catalyst to making it happen. And with wanting to do so much, if you just focus on one thing at a time, you can make giant strides and then move on to the next thing. So the real test was not whether or not I could make it through these 3 months (not giving up and coming home, losing sight of my goals, etc.), but it's just the studying before the big exam of life.

Needless to say, I'm very much excited to come home and see everyone. I've wanted the time to myself and now I want the time with others again. And I miss the food, the wine, friends, bbq-ing, and everything else that's back home in Chicago. These trips are good for the soul, but I'm glad I have a place I can call home.

So what's in store for the last week and a half? I'm on Koh Pha-ngan right now, staying at a beachside bungalow doing my own workouts. The muay thai gym was pretty garbagey and I thought, I'm tired of muay thai, I'm just going to focus on me a little earlier than planned. I got a 5 pass membership to an a/c gym (!!!) here and have been swimming, running and other things I can do on my own until Sunday when I leave for another bungalow on the west side of the island for 5 nights so I can reflect on the trip and take it easy on myself. For 3 months I've been working out twice per day on average, anywhere from 2-5 hours in the hot, humid weather of southern Thailand. I'm tired. I'm sore. I'm exhausted. I'll need those few days. Then next Friday I head to Bangkok for 3 nights where I'll be exploring the city and doing as much as I can until I leave that following Monday night. It's been a whirlwind and it honestly felt like just yesterday I was getting in the cab from the Phuket airport headed to Phromthep. I don't know how much I'll update from here on out since I only have internet at the cafe and I don't know the situation at the next 2 places I'll be, but I'm sure I'll post a few more things.

After arriving in Koh Samui, I was immediately hit with feelings of "this is it?" when I got to the camp. I haven't checked out the island yet, will be doing so this weekend, but this camp is quite underwhelming. And after last night of having to go past packs of dogs to leave the camp and get dinner, yes, more than 1 pack, I ultimately decided that I need to leave, no choice really. I was already planning on it, but today I paid for 2 weeks here and I'll be taking off for Koh Phangan on the 20th of Feb for a week of one on one training at Kobra Gym, staying a bungalow with the beach at my doorstep and then heading up the side of the island to a remote area to stay in a traditional Thai bungalow. No a/c, no tv, no internet, just me, a hammock and my thoughts. I figure it'll be a good time for me to unwind for a few days and just read, write and draw. Then I'll be headed to Bangkok on March 4th, a day earlier than planned, and be staying at a nice hotel for cheaper than I was expecting to pay. I'm really excited for this change for a few reasons.

First of all, I'm sick of muay Thai, haha. It's great and all, a good workout and really beats you up...but I'm tired of it. Since being here, I realized that their sessions are very much the same and they don't cater to your needs like Phromthep did. So it's added to the monotony of the day in/day out routines.

Secondly, the noise and the atmosphere here is just ridiculous. Phuket was much calmer than all the racket here. We'll see how this weekend pans out as I drive around the island, taking pictures, doing the tourist thing and trying all sorts of food. But I hear Koh Phangan isn't nearly as hectic as here.

Lastly, I realized something the other day. I've been in Thailand for over 2 months now and I feel like there's still some stuff I need to do. Who knows if I'll ever be back here in my life. When we took a day trip to Racha island (most beautiful island I've been to), I saw all these little bungalows overlooking the water and I thought, man, I won't get to do that while here. Well, that's changed now and I'll get a couple of spots to stay and take in that experience. Definitely looking forward to that. People who know me know that I love a good roughing it experience as it makes you appreciate what you have back at home. This will be good for me, I feel like it's what I should do to truly wrap up this experience in the best way possible. Additionally, I found out I can take a boat/bus route up to Bangkok for about $30 which is nice considering I was going to spend $150+ on airfare. It'll take all day, but I don't mind as I can read and I'll still have 3 full days in Bangkok since my flight back home that Monday isn't until late at night. Lots to see in those 3 days.

A few recommendations:

I was really looking forward to Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell and it's lived up to the hype. Probably the best book I've read so far in terms of keeping my interest and the knowledge within. I plan to read much more by him. A big disappointment was the autobiography of Ben Franklin. I could not concentrate on that book, definitely a huge bore to me.

I downloaded Moby's Play the other day and it's great to relax to. A bunch of good tracks on there and like nothing else I have in my music library. Not for everyone, but definitely something you can listen to when you need to concentrate on something.

Chocolate soy milk. I'm living off that stuff. Oh, and I had bananas in coconut milk for dessert last night as it was cheap and I figure relatively healthy. Plus it's on like every menu at every restaurant. That and mango on sticky rice which I haven't tried yet. But the bananas in coconut milk was awesome. I'll have to get it again.

All I got for now.

After almost 9 hours of traveling, I arrived on the island of Koh Samui. I took the bus/ferry route over an airplane trip due to the lower cost and the opportunity to see the countryside, which, after the first hour or 2, was just like an interstate in the U.S. except with more tropical vegetation. Oh well, at least it was more turbulent than an airplane ride, ha! It really wasn't too bad and I managed to keep the seat next to me vacant for my stuff and more room to "lay out" in, so to speak. I also managed to read quite a bit, the whole trip didn't seem to take too long.

I was a bit sad to leave Phromthep, although happy at the same time. I had a lot of fun there, was pushed to my limits physically and mentally and met some very interesting people. However, I needed a change of scenery, so I was happy to move on, but this was not the change I was hoping for. My first impressions of the island are not good. In fact, I'm so disappointed with it right off the bat that I'm thinking of changing my plans pretty soon here. I haven't paid for the gym yet, but I may only do 2 weeks to see how I like it and decide where to go from there. The island seems okay, but I haven't seen much of it yet, so I can't judge it (more on this in the lessons from music part in the 2nd part of this entry), but the gym is not nearly what I expected. The room/bathroom is better than the last place although I don't have a microwave or kitchen area, which limits what I can eat in my room. But the gym seems very cramped, very run down (there's rust all over the cardio equipment, what?) and just generally unfriendly. It's in a very rundown area with dilapidated buildings next door, and you have to take a back road of sorts from the main road to get to it. Here I thought it was just off the beach in a decent area. Turns out I was way wrong. I even had to do the "fake throw a stone at dogs" thing, not once but twice, to get some suspicious dogs away from me. One went a little nuts and backed off but started barking like nuts. And this is on the road to get to the camp, where I will have to walk several times a day since there's no food at the camp! They have a breakfast thing apparently, but I'll have to go to restaurants for every meal unlike the last camp where there was a cafe right there with health food. If you ask me, a camp like Phromthep could take over the muay thai business in any part of Thailand, if it just changed a few things.

I'm getting a bit ahead of myself since these are only first impressions, but jeez, I was even getting hassled way more than normal to get a massage when I was looking for a decent place to eat. So because of all of this, I thought about what my options were over dinner. I haven't paid yet so I could up and leave tomorrow if I wanted (not going to happen), but my new plan is quite appealing. I'm thinking of staying here 2 weeks for training and then going to Koh Phangan for 1 week due to how much good stuff I've heard about it. When I was eating dinner I got to talking with a Canadian who recommended it over Samui and I know John really enjoyed it as well. This last month was supposed to be more of a reward since I'm almost done here and I feel like I'm roughing it now more than before, haha. If I went to Phangan for a week, I'd plan on getting a bungalow by the water and just live in the moment, relaxing, eating the local food and actually enjoying this trip for once. I would continue my workout routine, but no muay thai. Just swimming, running, jumprope and anything I can do outside of a gym, essentially. It actually sounds quite intriguing and I think I'd get more out of this trip. Then I'd head to Bangkok for my last week where I'd train at another gym and check out the city before heading back to Chicago. I'll think about it the next few days, but this seems to be the best route for me right now. I wanted to enjoy these last few weeks more than I think I will with where this camp is.

Now, back to the other topic for this blog: life lessons learned from music. The other day I obtained (downloaded, ahem) all the albums from Coheed and Cambria except their first one which I already had, just on a whim. I couldn't believe I was missing out on them for this many years. I saw them way back in '02 or '03, had some of their music, didn't give their first album much of a chance, and that was that. Despite only hearing good things about them from friends, I never gave them a chance. I naively thought that they were a lot heavier than they are precisely based on a few songs which start off darker than they really are. Some songs are more on the harder/darker side than I like, but most have this sense of glory or epicness that I've never heard in music before. First life lesson: don't judge. Don't judge a book by it's cover, a band by one song or a person by how they appear. The funny thing is, there's been a few bands who I've written off before giving them a chance, only to find out that I really love their music and should've given them more of a chance. A good lesson in life when it comes to meeting new people. You'll befriend people who are your opposite, maybe even marry someone who's your opposite, but you'll never know how good of a match you are unless you give them a chance.

Life lesson number 2: getting out of your comfort zone is a rewarding endeavor. Everyone has a lifestyle they're comfortable with, just like everyone listens to the same music all the time. Most people have their favorite bands that they listen to more than others, or a genre that they stick to. But holy cow, you don't know what you're missing out on until you give other things, people, restaurants, places, bands, wines, bars, WHATEVER, a chance. You may not find your new favorite food, but you could be pleasantly surprised by what you try and it'll open your eyes to the possibilities of what you could be missing. If you spend every week working only to succumb to your neighborhood watering hole every weekend, you don't know what you could be missing out on. Chicago is a big city, there's 1,000 other things you can do other than going to the Cubby Bear on a Saturday night, like every other Saturday night.

Life lesson number 3: it's okay to feel all emotions, but don't get hung up on them. When some people are feeling down, they put on some blues or depressing music that they can wallow in. That's okay. What's not okay is to continue listening to it for too long, just to feel sorry for yourself. If you stay depressed over something for longer than is necessary to deal with your grief, no one will enjoy being around you. If you always listen to the blues, you won't give yourself a chance to move on because you'll have that music that you can relate to that you think may be healing you when in fact it prolongs your depression. That's just an example. Music evokes all sorts of emotions from us, as does real life, but if you stay hung up on them, you'll never get back to normal. Change the cd.

Life lesson number 4: Maybe the right person isn't who you think it is, maybe you haven't met them yet. Think of your favorite bands over the years. Tastes change, but you think you have a favorite band until you hear another band/musician and think, no! THAT'S my favorite! Take me for example. When I first got into music, I knew very little. I listened to oldies or metallica and nirvana, that's pretty much it. I liked that music and still do. But nirvana was my favorite band by far, no doubt I loved them. I still like them, but they are nowhere near my favorite. I started getting into more metal and rap in high school, then punk, then realized there's so much I like, I want to listen to it all! My favorite bands went from nirvana to korn/limp bizkit (whoops?) to mest to the starting line to I'm not even sure right now, probably say anything. The point is, as I find more and more music, expose myself to more bands, I find new ones that are my favorite. You can stick to the bands you loved as a child, but that's like marrying the first person you have a crush on. Sure they may be great, but you never know if there was someone better for you and you just didn't think to listen to anyone new.

Last life lesson: stop caring what everyone else thinks, no one is paying attention. A big thing with music that really annoys me is actually two-fold: elitism and shame. People who not only think everything they listen to is the best music out there but that anything they don't like is garbage and anyone who listens to said garbage is stupid. Then people are ashamed that they enjoy certain music, only because of what other people would think if they found out. Who cares if you like boy bands, embrace it. I'll admit right now, out of 5,000+ songs in my iTunes I have (counting...): 6 songs by Gloria Estefan, 6 by George Michael, 6 Barry Manilow, 2 by Tina Turner, 4 by Paula Abdul, 8 by the Beach Boys, 17 by Madonna, "I wanna dance with somebody" by Whitney Houston, "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls and "Mambo No. 5" by Lou Bega. No macarena...yet. I would have been horrified if guys in high school found out I actually liked these songs. But who cares? They're catchy and I like them. There's nothing wrong with it and if there was, I wouldn't care. It doesn't matter what other people think. No one really notices anyway. And you know you'd sing along with Wannabe if it somehow came onto a party playlist.

Anyway, these were things I was thinking about the other day as I realized how far my music taste has evolved over the past 15 years or so. I remember when I went off to college, with my very own computer and winamp player! So excited to play all this music. But I only had 300 songs on there. I thought, how could people have 1,000 or more? I didn't think I'd get that many more songs honestly. But if you expand your taste, are open to new possibilities, get out of your music comfort zone and come to terms with what you like and will listen to it no matter what anyone thinks, you realize there's so much out there to discover. You never know if your favorite band is just one listen away.

Well, I'm out for training for the 3rd time now, for at least a couple of days. On Monday I was doing the crossfit routine which included 3 rounds of double unders with the jumprope which I'm not great at. Well, apparently my form was pretty poor and I caused too much force on my right foot because the next morning I woke up unable to bend my right toe without terrible pain. If I just don't move it, it throbs with a slight pain which is very annoying. Today (Wednesday) I woke up to it hurting even more, barely able to walk on it. I have to walk on the right edge of my foot to get around which is annoying. Luckily the people here are very helpful and recommended a strain/muscle ache ointment that I'm now using, wrapping my foot up in one of my hand wraps, haha. And one of the trainers is going to massage it later today as it's similar to a fight injury.

I feel pretty lucky still (or pathetic, haha) since my injuries/sicknesses have been pretty tame to some of the people here. Injuries of late have included stress fractures, a broken foot, motorbike accidents, ankle sprains, to name a few. Most of these come from fights, training too hard or just accidents outside training, but for me to just have a bruised knuckle, strained foot and a slight bit of food poisoning isn't too bad when you consider what other injuries could keep you out longer. To me it's worth it though. I feel a lot better these days given my higher level of fitness. I wonder what it'll be like training once I get back to Chicago. The heat/humidity is increasing day by day here making it that much harder to train 100%. You have to do the best you can given the climate, but it should prep me rather well for the calmer climate back home.

So I plan to read a lot I guess while I wait for my foot to heal. But I'm not going to let this keep me totally away. I can still use the rowing machine and do upper body workouts, so that's what I'll be doing. I guess that's really how you push yourself right? When one thing goes wrong, do what you can to still realize your goals or focus on another thing that can go right. I just don't want to waste any days here.

This week started off fine, just like any other week. Monday I had yoga and day one of crossfit (which I'll get into) and muay thai later in the afternoon. I felt great after training in the afternoon, like I could keep going. Tuesday was Spartacus day and afternoon training as I have switched to the afternoons for a week to see how I do. After shadowboxing, bag work and 5 rounds on the pad, I could barely do anything. I was completely wiped out. After a short break, I did a relaxing half hour on the rowing machine before quitting. Some extra carbs and a good night sleep was all I needed, right? Wednesday was just crossfit and muay thai, but again, I was gassed after one hour of training. So I took today off and now I find myself achingly ecstatic to get to a bowl of oatmeal. Am I getting to the point of going stir crazy? Of having the same routines, the same foods, in the same place that I'm just getting sick of it all?

Tonight I was very not looking forward to my meal which I had planned to be tuna with this tomato/cucumber/egg salad they make. I haven't had it in awhile and enjoyed it before. But I didn't even finish it tonight and hurried back to the bungalow to eat some oatmeal to get something warm to eat, something that I enjoy. I'm excited to eat oatmeal. This is what it has come to.

This weekend marks the halfway point of my trip and I have to wonder, although I'm making significant progress with all my goals, why have I suddenly become irritable with my situation and lost some motivation and energy? Perhaps I just need a break. But I think it's a change of scenery. I have 2 more weeks at Phromthep before moving on to Ko Samui and it seems like it won't be a moment too soon. I have 4 weeks at Ko Samui before a short weekend trip to Bangkok and finally coming home. The whole trip is going so fast, and yet, some fire in my punches is lacking and the pace is slowing down. I'm punching and kicking harder, but the motivation is not there. I need a jump start, anyone have any suggestions?

Luckily the accommodations on Ko Samui seem very nice, there's a pool, it's close to a beautiful beach and I'll have the added benefits of unlimited training and new food. With all those changes, I should be able to kick up the fire again that overcame me the first month here. During these first 7 weeks I've lost 16 pounds, have definitely noticed some physique changes and have read almost 20 books. It's a great feeling to get through some accomplishments and I want to keep that going. But this routine and isolation is driving me nuts. I find myself watching man vs. food, thinking about the food back home, reading and watching wine videos all day. These are the things I miss. But as I watch man vs. food on youtube, I'm surprised I don't drool all over the laptop. I can't help it either. I miss the pizza, ice cream, large portions, mexican food, cheeseburgers that give you a heart attack, etc. Perhaps because I eat so healthy this stuff just seems like a distant dream. But I don't want to hold it in such high regard. I don't want to gain 20 lbs as soon as I get back, ha. Those things are nice to have, but in moderation. Cheat night is tomorrow night and I'm planning to eat a ton of pizza and tiramisu. How I need it.

The worst part of tonight's dinner was that right after I ordered some people invited me to the nearby steakhouse for dinner. And if I didn't just order, I probably would have gone. It would've been nice to have and apparently the aussie beef is particularly healthy, which I wasn't too aware of. I knew it was healthier than what's in America, but I can wait for a real cheat meal tomorrow.

So in order to keep things fresh, and to throw my body for a loop, I changed up my routine this week which would normally work. I'm just in this funk. I started crossfit (http://www.crossfit.com/) which I've done before, but never adhered to simply because I was doing other things. But I'm going to try it out for at least a few weeks to see how it goes. It's basically intense exercise in a short amount of time. Great to change things up especially when the gym trips were getting stale and this regimen is highly praised. I also may do some mountain biking my last week here. I will be doing more swimming at Ko Samui and look into other routines to keep things fresh. It's always important to not only find something that makes you enjoy working out, but to change it up often so your body doesn't get accustomed to it. Same goes for food. There's a nutritionist/doctor on WGN news who is a big advocate for totally changing your diet every 4 days (I believe) to keep your body guessing. It does work, but it's obviously not the only way. But these are things to remember when plateauing.

So, I got that off my chest. I'm now going to go watch Adam Richman eat a steak the size of his head and continue reading the behemoth biography of Teddy Roosevelt which is proving to be one of my favorite reads so far.

Of course, I could always watch this clip every morning when I wake up to motivate myself for the day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIyCwomjKWY&feature=related

I just realized that I have 60 days left of my trip, it's going by so fast. It really seems like I just arrived yesterday and John was visiting during his tour-de-Asia trip. So I suppose a recap is in order, it'll help align my goals back in place even if I think I'm making good progress.

First I have to note that there seems to be an epidemic in the camp right now. On Tuesday I felt pretty weak during my muay Thai session, throwing very weak kicks by the end of the 5th round of padwork. Normally I wouldn't think much of it. It was a more humid day and there seemed to be smoke in the air from something being burned nearby. I found it a bit harder to breath, but got through the session, had another workout outside in the afternoon and was feeling ok. Wednesday morning I got up for training and during the warm-up stretching I was not feeling like doing a 2 hour workout. It's the first time I was like "ehhhh, I don't want to do this" but figured I may had just been feeling particularly lazy that day. Well, we did some shadowboxing like always and then I had the 5 rounds of padwork. (they switched from 4 rounds to 5, not sure why, but I think it's 5 of 3 min. instead of 4 of 4 min.). After the first round I felt really weak, no energy. I pushed through it but was completely wiped out after 5 rounds. Then going to the bag I found myself barely able to do anything. A fellow camper noted that I looked gray-ish in the face and had lost considerable weight the last few days. So we both agreed I needed to stop, get some rest and eat a big breakfast.

I decided to spend the day resting and trying to replenish my fluids and caloric intake. At breakfast I ate 5 eggs, 5 pieces of toast, an order of chicken pad thai and 2 bowls of fruit/yogurt/muesli. I felt much better, but needed to rest for the day. I wasn't hungry the rest of the day, but had a green smoothie around 4pm and took a quick trip to the store to pick up a few things, including electrolytes to help maintain fluids and bring back up my sodium/mineral levels which could be low. Well, once I got back I felt pretty awful. Still full, bloated and it only got worse. I'll spare the details, but I spent the night tossing and turning, being sick in the bathroom and oddly enough, burping a lot. It was such a weird feeling and although I felt better today, I'm using some discretion and did not workout today. I'll probably do an easy workout tomorrow and then take the weekend off. I was planning on exploring the island this weekend anyway, so the time couldn't have been better.

Then today I found out that all 4 guys in one house were sick all night, another girl was throwing up during the day before a fight she had wednesday night (which she won!) and some others were sick as well. So they're trying to figure out what it was, but my guess is it was something at breakfast. Anyway, I've spent the day reading and taking it easy, I hope to be 100% by tomorrow.

So to recap the trip so far, I'm pretty happy with the progress. One thing I'm not happy with is that I realized that I haven't spent much time exploring the country. I've seen plenty of things around here, visited Phi Phi island for nye, but other than that I've been a hermit. So this weekend I plan to rent a scooter, do some shopping, visit some other beaches, check out the local art scene and see what the restaurants have to offer outside of the camp. I don't want to leave the country and regret not having seen much of the culture.

In regards to my goals, I've stayed pretty true to my plan. At my lowest I was down 14 pounds (what the heck?), and am down 12 pounds right now. I'm concerned I'm losing too much weight too quickly (odd enough) which may have added to my sickness although if others are sick too, that may not be it. However, after talking with the woman who suggested I quit training yesterday, I realized that I perhaps am creating too big of a deficit in my calories. To lose weight you simply have to take in less calories than you expend. Then your body is forced to use your stores of fat and muscle to keep you going. Keep your protein up and do strength training and it's gotta burn off that fat (as I understand it, correct me if I'm wrong). One pound is equal to 3,500 calories so if you create a deficit of 500 calories per day, you'll lose 1 pound per week which is healthy. At this rate, I'm losing 3, possibly 4 pounds per week...not healthy. In order to do that, I have to create a deficit of 10,500 calories per week, or 1500 per day. Between a normal burn of 1000 calories per day, 1000-1500 during training and another 500-1000 during weightlifting per day, I'm using somewhere in the 3000 calorie range per day. And based on a diet of a lot of fruit, veggies and lean proteins, I'm not taking in too many calories, probably 1500-2000. So I'll have to adjust that going forward. Even so, I'm happy with how the transformation is going so far. I'm excited to see how I progress the next couple months.

Other than that, I've been reading way more than the average person does in a day, I'm a nerd. I'm on my 14th book since leaving (although I stopped 2 halfway due to me getting nothing from them), which I'm glad I was able to keep up with despite the doubt of a few people, ahem, Alberto and Noelle, that didn't think I'd read more than 8 or so books. My reading comprehension has always been terrible, I just can't keep focused on what I'm reading. It's tough, but I'm trying to get better at it. In fact, although I was finding it hard to read at first, barely able to read 100 pages per day, I'm breezing through books in 2-3 days rather easily now. I just finished the Adventures of Huck Finn by Mark Twain and Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer, both very good reads that I found myself getting wrapped into easily. Right now I'm on Thoughts Without a Thinker which I borrowed from Micah and although it's a tough read, it has some interesting points in the relation between Buddhist principles and Western psychotherapy...which I felt appropriate for where I'm at now. I'm excited to get to the books I have planned for the 2nd half of my trip...even the 700 page behemoth of the autobiography of Teddy Roosevelt which I hear is outstanding.

Other than that, I spend my time searching the internet for interesting articles, reading about personal development, entrepreneurship, wine, finances and watching Scrubs on youtube. Here are the sites I visit regularly, if you're interested in checking some out:

http://artofmanliness.com/

http://tv.winelibrary.com/

http://www.getrichslowly.org/blog/

http://www.inc.com/

http://blog.entrepreneur.com/

http://www.stevepavlina.com/

If anyone knows of a good real estate blog or site to check out, please let me know. I keep updated on Crain's, and I know about cribchatter although I don't check it out too often. But I'm looking for anything else that may be interesting/entertaining or is more geared toward learning about real estate and development.

But, the most important part of this trip is that I feel like I'm recreating that spark and passion to do some big/fun things upon my return. Sometimes life just gets too blah and you need something to send it for a loop, mix it up a bit. At least I know I'm capable of entertaining my desires in that regard.

With the new year here and 2010 now behind me, I figured it was a good time to finally write up the big Why am I doing this? post. I will warn you that this is a very long post but I don't include everything due to some personal reasons, and it's about me (obviously) but I hope I can inspire some others to be better people, because isn't that what life's all about?

First, to recap my New Years Eve, it was pretty nuts and probably the best NYE I've ever had. If anyone has realized when I talk about new years plans, I always want to do something different. Going to the bars or a hotel party has been done, it's all the same and just isn't fun to me. I'd rather go to a house party or some destination like this year. If you want something different next year, a group of us are already planning to head out to Colorado for a short ski trip in a huge private lodge/cabin in the mountains.

If I was back in Chicago, I probably would have gone to see Flosstradamus at Lincoln Hall, and/or a house party. But since I'm in Thailand, I had lots of options. There's the full moon party on Koh Pha Ngan which was my original plan, but some others that I was planning on going with decided not to go and only a few people from the camp went. Plus I'll be over there for the last month of my trip and can head to a full moon party in February, so I decided to go to Phi Phi Island with some people here. A group of 9 of us went and we had planned to stay up all night to catch the 9am ferry back. We left at noon on New Years Eve day, and arrived after a 45 min cab ride and 2 hour ferry ride. We spent most of the day looking for ridiculous things to wear, eating some food, drinking and just exploring some of the shops and bars on the island. We then headed to the Reggae Bar where they were offering free buckets of mixed drinks to anyone that stepped in the ring to fight (with protection). Obviously since I was with a bunch of people from a muay Thai camp, this was a no brainer.

Even though we all had a few drinks in us by this point, we paired up and headed into the ring. I fought with Joe (video should be on facebook soon) a guy from the camp who has more experience than me. Luckily he went easy on me and was pretty buzzed, so I ended up winning. It was definitely a lot of fun, but I don't think I'll be doing a legit fight while here, I had a pretty poor form, ha! But to my defense, I couldn't hit his jaw due to recent surgery he had, we had been drinking and the ring was slippery from sweat. Quite scary, but glad I did it. We ended up watching fireworks at midnight and then searching forever for the beach bar where everyone was at because we kept getting wrong directions. Once we found it, I was quite taken aback by the number of people there. It was about a quarter to half mile long party of various bars blasting music, dance floors on the beach, places to lay down on the beach around little fires and thousands of people dancing away. We ended up staying up through the night with some resting in there and then got breakfast at 7:30am so we could catch the 9 am ferry back. People were still dancing at 7am, not sure how they kept their energy up. We all napped on the ferry back, which was much needed obviously. I've slept 3 different times since we got back and am now back on track.

Why am I doing this trip?

It's difficult to get all of this out in words, and like I mentioned earlier, I'm not writing out every reason in this blog due to personal reasons. But I want to try and explain it for family, friends and myself really. Some people were supportive, some were skeptical and some were just concerned about my safety and finances. I appreciate that so many people care, but it really didn't matter what others wanted me to do. I was going to do whatever I wanted, because really, it's my life. I spent the better portion of 8 years of my life in a relationship, trying to make someone else happy and not realizing that I was letting my own development slip by. I didn't take the necessary time to think, what do I really want to do with my life?

So while I appreciate that people are concerned about my well-being, I can reassure you that 1) my finances are fine, I was able to close a bunch of deals right before I left and I should be coming back to the same financial position I was in before I left, believe it or not. Living in southeast Asia is very reasonable and I was able to postpone my gym membership, phone service, etc. to save even more money. 2) My health is fine. I had a little sore throat when I first arrived, but I pushed too hard right off the bat and have since adjusted to the weather and workout regimen. I haven't had any infections or sicknesses to be concerned about. 3) My safety is fine. I know some people think it's dangerous over here, but really, it isn't. Not once have I felt threatened in a situation or that I was in a dangerous circumstance. It is not a third world country, they are quite developed, especially when compared to some countries. I'm also in high tourist areas which can attract muggers, but I know how to handle myself and I've felt perfectly safe my whole time here so far. Also, the people are here are incredibly friendly and are willing to help. They understand that they thrive on tourism, so don't bite the hand that feeds, in a sense.

I first toyed around with the idea of taking an extended trip for myself last spring. At the beginning of 2010 I determined that I was going to start making some changes and work on myself for the year. I looked into different career paths, I upped my workout routine, I read more, and I tried to simplify my life. But with so many options and distractions, I thought about getting away for awhile to really focus on me and just...think. Think about what I want, what my plans are going to be and how I'm going to change. I wasn't depressed, but I was uninspired, unmotivated, not passionate for seemingly anything (or so I thought) and in a word, unhappy. I'm very fortunate to have loving family and friends, a job, a roof over my head, food, a car and some niceties. But nothing was getting me inspired anymore. I felt like I lost a zest for life. It's hard to explain, but it was just something that kept bothering me. I felt out of place and living a stressful, routine lifestyle. Work during the week, stress over career decisions, go out to bars on the weekend, repeat.

So I needed a change. And not just a simple change. A complete overhaul. I had told people that there are a million reasons for me to do this. One person wanted to know every reason, which meant a lot to me, that someone was that interested in what I was doing. I guess a lot of people say they're going to change, or do this or that, but then let it fall through and get back to their routine lifestyle that perhaps they're unhappy with, but not motivated enough to make the change. It's a lot easier to complain about your situation than do anything to change it. But I wanted to change, I was tired of just getting by.

I read more on personal development this year than anyone could fathom. I took multiple career personality type tests, spent endless hours thinking about my options, thought about what I wanted to do for myself, how I was going to make myself happy, etc. It was so stressful because the more you think about it, the more worried you get and the more options you have, the harder it is to make a decision. Additionally, by thinking and not doing, you prolong the situation you're in. So I just had to stop and think, how am I going to fix this. The best book I read in a long while, possibly ever, was What's Holding You Back by Sam Horn. I remember reading it on a plane ride to Seattle where I was going to meet up with John to head to Vancouver for the Olympics. We decided a month or so before the Olympics to just go. How many times will you have this chance? I spent $3-400 on roundtrip airfare and we were able to get a bedroom in a woman's house where she rents out her basement of a few bedrooms and common kitchen area to travelers. I think we spent $75 per night? It was quite funny how many people said "HA! Good luck finding a place and getting into the city!" Well, joke's on them. There was absolutely 0 wait at the border and we got a place that was a 10 minute train ride from downtown Vancouver. We partied with people from all over the world, watched curling and luge and other events at bars while drinking with others and took in all the sites the Games had to offer. Sometimes when you try to do something extraordinary or different, those who "can't" will try to bring you down. This is something I've read several times when reading articles on starting your own business, traveling for an extended period or doing anything else that people are jealous of because they're stuck in a cubicle. You don't have to be there.

But back to the book. What I got from it was that you can do anything you want, you don't have to let past circumstances hold you back, or the fear of future failure keep you paralyzed from doing anything. Think of something you've wanted to do and why you haven't done it. Is it fear, laziness, excuses? Also, what's the absolute worst case scenario that would happen if you did do this. In my case, what's the absolute worst situation that could happen from traveling to Thailand for 3 months. Well, I could get blown up. Now, what's the more reasonable worst case scenario. Something goes wrong on the trip where I have to spend a significant amount of money to get out of it and head back home where I'm stuck with not much money to get by on. But, I have a job when I get back, so I will be making money as soon as I get back. I could get dengue fever or food poisoning or some other disease. Most can be treated and I'll recover just fine. Now, what's the best case scenario? I'm able to get clarity on my life, get in shape like I want and find the motivation that will propel me well into the future. It has proven to be 100% of the latter and 0% of the former, thus far.

Really, when taking a risk in life, it's smart to weigh the pros and cons. Everybody knows that. But you can't let exaggerated cons paralyze you from doing anything. Some people would say, work on your career, save money...play it safe. This never much appealed to me. Yes, it's smart to save money. But it's not smart to sacrifice your life all in the sake of money. It makes me sick to see how many people are worried about how much money they'll have for retirement, or competing with others to have a bigger nest egg. If you spend all your life saving, you'll have let it slip by before you know it. Life is for enjoying, but it seems like most are concerned with stifling. Go to school -> get a job -> get married -> have a kid or 2 -> retire -> go on a cruise -> die. Scary to me that so many follow this typical scenario. Why not travel the world a bit? Why not start your own business, work for yourself? What about volunteering to help do something to change the world? There is so much more to life than what we think. I'm just trying to get a piece of it.

During 2010 I thought about what the hell do I want? Well, one goal I've had is to be in top shape, at least once in my life. I also realized that I want to call my own shots, work for myself. I also want to oil paint in my free time, perhaps pick up something musically like piano or dj-ing. I want to travel a bit, but I like being at home in Chicago as well, so I doubt I'd ever move somewhere overseas for that long. I want to be able to golf in Antigua even though I suck at golf. Just some examples. But that first goal of getting in shape is always the top of my new years resolutions list and is the longest running goal I can remember. So I was going to do something about it.

Some of the other reasons I wanted to take a trip like this:

• I wanted to learn how to protect myself while learning a fighting technique
• I lost some confidence and wanted to regain it before starting my own business
• I wanted to toughen up, I became a softy in my head
• I wanted to experience something different
• I wanted to get away, just for awhile
• I wanted to be more literate, more articulate
• I was tired of routine and wanted to do a once-in-a-lifetime experience
• I wanted to live in isolation, relatively speaking, to see if I can handle it
• I want to get that fiery competitive spirit back in me. I once had it.

There are other reasons, but they're more personal. I just felt like going somewhere like Thailand would help me accomplish every goal I had set out for myself. It really came down to jiu-jitsu in Brazil or muay Thai in Thailand. I don't have much of a desire to visit Brazil right now except to enjoy the beautiful beaches there, so Thailand it was. Plus it's halfway around the world, far from everything. Now I can think, read, workout and totally focus on me. It's quite unreal to see the results so far just after a month of nothing but sleep, eating, working out, reading and browsing the internet for help - personal development, career stuff, and a bit of entertainment to keep me sane. That's about all I do. I am trying to enjoy the country as well by going to see the sights and all that tourist jazz, but that's not my reason for coming here. If I let myself become caught up in the nightlife and didn't achieve my goals, I would've felt like I failed which wouldn't give me much confidence. I wanted to do something where I thought, I got through that, I can do anything.

So back to this complete overhaul, what does 2011 and the future hold for me? Can't say exactly, but I know what I'll try to do. Once I get back I'll be working full time as a realtor and learning about real estate development. While I don't know if that's the path I'll most enjoy, it interests me, I can call my own shots and the income potential is unlimited. I realized that I have no motivation if I get the same paycheck every week no matter what I do during that week. My favorite jobs were working as a caddy and playing poker. The only thing they have in common is that the income is totally dependent on you, and I like the challenge. However, I realized that I don't want to play poker forever. In fact, I hated the stress and it was only meant as a temporary means to get where I wanted. But slowly it became 24/7 for me. I was playing poker, working for a poker company and thinking about it when not doing those other 2 things. However, it doesn't give me any lasting value, and it was making me miserable. But I felt stuck in a way because I also hated my urban planning internships, haha. So what the heck was I supposed to do? I felt pressure from others and my past to get a job in urban planning even though I realized it wasn't what motivated me. I didn't care. Simple as that. That's not a fun way to live.

That's where the career change hit me. One day I thought to myself "Wow, I don't have to do something in this field just because of what 2 degrees say. I should do what makes me happy, something that gets me excited to work." It was a very liberating thought. I felt very relieved when I left my last internship and decided to focus on my options. But, not only will I be working in real estate, I'm going to start a side business or two to get passive income coming in. I've extensively researched entrepreneurship this year and was close to starting a few companies only to realize they have a high chance to fail for various reasons. What I have found when talking about starting my own business is that I'm not the only one. I have many people interested in joining and helping out with their various skills, which is great to know. If you're going to start your own business, surround yourself with people that are smarter than you. It helps.

While here I've been reading a lot online about entrepreneurship, but it's more of a focus for the 2nd part of my trip. The first part is about me and making myself a better man. I wanted to be in incredible shape. So what better way than surrounding yourself with some of the most intense, athletic people in the world doing grueling workouts 4-6 hours per day? Muay Thai is not easy. They will push you until you want to throw up. But I don't regret my decision one bit. I'm seeing results already: after one month I've lost 8 pounds and am seeing some definite definition of various muscle groups. 3 months is probably not enough for the goals I want, but I'm learning a lot while here and will be able to keep my training up once home, although I will focus more on triathlon training more than anything else. The physical challenges are unlike anything I've done before, and it's showing.

Those are a few of my goals for 2011. Going forward 5 years I also plan on doing a half ironman, trying to sell oil paintings once I take some classes, getting a dream loft in Chicago and getting a dog. These are some of the things I want. This is what I've learned so far. I never wanted to be rich just for the sake of being rich. I want to have money so I don't have to worry about money. I don't want that same paycheck every week, I want my potential to be unlimited. I hated going somewhere to work 9-5, but I was gladly getting up at 7am to work on things I wanted to work on. And I didn't mind working nights and weekends. I want that flexibility. I think most people do. The difference is I'm doing something about it. I never wanted to settle in a relationship and I don't want to settle in a job. The day I'm working in a cubicle is the day that anyone reading this is allowed to come and punch me in the face, free shot. Your job shouldn't be a chore, you need to love what you do and integrate it with your lifestyle. I just needed time to figure that out.

As soon as I get back, I have a list of things to do. These include getting rid of all the rubbish I've built up, clothes that don't fit or I don't wear, building a high powered computer so I'm not wasting time on my ridiculously slow laptop, drinking some wine!, spending time with everyone and rewarding myself with a small shopping spree for new clothes. I'm already feeling a lot better than when I came. I still can't believe I'm actually doing it. Actually committing to do what you say is half the battle I've learned. After that you just have to follow through and not give up. The changes I make on this journey were well worth the risks involved. I hope I inspire you to throw a wrench in your lifestyle if it's mediocre. But if you're with me, I'll do what I can to help you out.

If you made it this far, I commend your efforts. Time to get a healthy breakfast and a $5 massage. Life is good.

Well it's been 2 weeks since I left for Thailand and although I'm starting to see some changes, I'm currently unable to do training sessions, for at least a day or 2 which is unfortunate. The main issue is I have a bruised right knuckle that I thought was better yesterday, but after several punches during pad work I found out that it wasn't quite ready yet. I bruised it on Saturday and Monday's session was pretty painful, but it felt fine for Tuesday afternoon...but it wasn't. I've been icing it and hope to have it better by Friday. But with Christmas and New Year's approaching, we have some time off from the gym so that'll give it some time as well. I also have a bruised left side and sore feet which are no big deal. Anyway, I should still be able to do some yoga and weightlifting so I don't feel like I'm wasting any time here.

So far I've been to the beach only twice and to Phromthep Cape twice, but I have a pretty serious tan going already. I can only imagine how dark I'll be by the time I get back. The bonus here is that if I get a bit darker, maybe I won't be as noticeable a farang (foreigner) as others here. Not too hard when your competition is mainly Brits and Aussies. Today is a gorgeous day out, but I may take it easy and read while recovering. I will go out for a bit, but a day of reading sounds pretty good to me.

Surprisingly, the days go by pretty fast here, especially if I don't do the morning run and have to wake up at the ass crack of dawn. This is mainly because I find it hard to stay up late after a day of working out and the addition of naps and a carefree lifestyle make it that much easier for the hours to slip away. This is good when I'm feeling homesick, but bad if I feel like I'm not meeting my goals. Yesterday I had weighed myself in the morning and was only down 2 lbs. on the trip which was very upsetting. But for some reason, in the evening I was down 6 lbs. This may be water weight, but I always drink a lot of water during the day and this morning I was still down about 6-7 lbs. So maybe it was something from the day before that was still with me, who knows. Either way, I'm happy with the progress there so far, plus I have 5 books down with some half read ones as well.

Part of my goal on this trip, as crazy as it sounds, was to read through 40 books of my choosing. I have always wanted to be better well read and more articulate so that's the reasoning. Being that it's about one book every 2.5 days, I do a lot of reading, but I'm on pace so far. It was disappointing to be reading a few books though and getting nothing out of them, hence the half read ones. I will go back to finish them at some point, but I was getting quite bored with them and thought it was silly to finish them just for the sake of saying I read it. I was also planning on writing up some reviews on them, but that also seems rather pointless. So rather, I'll just do some recommendations as I go along. The best ones I've read so far are Steppenwolf by Hermann Hesse and A Fighter's Heart by Sam Sheridan. Both intrigued me for different reasons, but I could relate to both and I didn't find my mind wandering off while reading. I had read Siddhartha by Hesse earlier in the year, really enjoyed it, so I picked up this one which is his most famous - detailing a reclusive man who has become soured on life but has his outlook refreshed when he meets the woman who changes everything for him. And A Fighter's Heart was the story of Sam, the author, who traveled around the world to train and see just what made a man have the want to fight, what he was out to prove - to others or himself. He went to Thailand, Brazil, Iowa, California among others to spend time in their worlds. Although wordy at times, I found it to be a good read, especially at the beginning of my trip. It was recommended to me by Brett McKay, the author of the art of manliness blog (http://artofmanliness.com/) which every guy should be reading if he isn't already. I had emailed him about something I can't recall, but we got to talking and he recommended the book. So check that out when you have some time, and get on the email list.

I guess I'll get into a blog post soon about why exactly I felt compelled to take this trip. I won't get into all the details, but perhaps I can inspire someone reading this to do a self-examination of their own, it's probably long overdue like it was for me.

A lot has happened in the past few days and I'm starting to feel like I'm getting in a groove already - how I wanted things to be. Saturday I was feeling a bit homesick, but then John came in and we had a good time while he was here. Granted it rained a lot (today is the first day it hasn't rained, but it's only 2:30pm), but we found time to read, check out some restaurants down the road and even visited Phromthep Cape which I took video of and previously posted. It was more incredible than I had imagined and I'm planning on going there at least once every other week (so 4 times I guess) to relax, read and just enjoy what this country has to offer. It's only about a half hour walk, I thought it may have been more.

On Sunday I started coming down with a sore throat, probably adjusting to the climate still + getting over jet lag. Luckily it was a day off from training and since it was raining most of the day, John and I just sat around and read some. Monday I decided to do the morning session of muay Thai despite still having a sore throat. I did the 5k again like I did Saturday and was utterly miserable during the big hill. I managed to finish and still do the training, but it took a toll on me and I decided to take it easy for a day or so. I skipped any afternoon workout after John had left and just took some medicine and slept it off.

John came to watch the last hour of the muay Thai training and I think he was quite taken back by it. Imagine a large outdoor gym filled with 16 punching bags, 2 rings, and 20+ incredibly sweaty people yelling, hitting pads and sparring with each other. He showed up to see the 4th round of my padwork with a trainer and thought it was pretty cool to watch. Maybe I can get a video up some day while here. Even though it's the hardest part of training, it's my favorite since I learn the most and it's fun to just go at it on the pads with the trainer.

Since I skipped the afternoon workout, I just napped, read and ate a quick dinner only to return and read/sleep some more. I'm glad I took it easy and though I woke up at 5:15am today, I skipped the morning session as I was still feeling uneasy and now congested. However, after breakfast I felt better and did the yoga class that they just started Monday. It was great to get some really good stretches in and I'm excited to take the class almost daily, great for the core and flexibility/stability. I always enjoyed class in Chicago, but it was expensive and I simply didn't have the time. Now that time is all I can find, I'm able to take it every day if I want. I'm going to head to the gym in a bit to get my first weightlifting session in in about 10 days. The gym at the camp is pretty inadequate and some of the guys here go to one down the road that has a lot better equipment.

I'm still debating how I'm going to continue with training, but one muay Thai session per day is enough if I'm also doing yoga, swimming and/or weightlifting. I'm a bit upset I signed up for the 2x per day for the first month, but it was only a little more expensive than 1x per day, so no biggie. I'm also upset with the twice daily buffet they offer for breakfast and dinner. I've found the breakfast to be fine, but the dinners have been unhealthy overall and not what I was expecting in terms of healthiness. I'll opt out of it next month and stick to the a la carte menu where, for example, I can get steamed vegetables and steamed chicken (my lunch today, which was very good) for 60 baht ($2) rather than averaging 120 baht per meal at the buffet. Sorry if all that was boring to read, but this is my blog, deal with it!

It's pretty interesting how you come to realize what's really vital in life as you live in modest means. My bungalow has only the essentials (but I'd trade the tv for a stove, surprisingly). It's rather small and can feel isolated at times, but it's all I need to survive, in a sense. A 11x11 bedroom, 8x18 shared kitchen/living room and a 3x6 bathroom is all you need. Some people here don't even have that, they live in houses that are falling apart and must be majorly infested with insects, mice and who knows what. I'm also getting by on fruit, vegetables, steamed chicken, steamed rice, various beans, eggs and various thai noodle dishes, at least for right now. I hope to get some oatmeal soon and perhaps, if I'm lucky, some whey protein to make shakes. But I constantly think about how lucky we all have it in America. Not saying you have to live like this here, but people live on means less than what I described. There are tons of little restaurants and stores that probably don't make 1/10th of what a similar place would make in the states. I don't usually send dishes back at restaurants, but I don't think I ever will now. And if I read someone complaining about something unimportant on, let's say facebook for an example, I can't help but wanting to call them an idiot and tell them how selfish/ridiculous they are being. This wasn't my intention when I came here, but I guess I have a new found appreciation for everything we have back home.

...was brutal. It's not impossible, but it is grueling and I found myself dying for the breaks all session. Luckily, they're very good trainers, providing adequate break time and encouraging you to drink water.

The morning training session was definitely easier, but possibly because it was my first one and my health was in pretty good shape. It started off with a 2k run (I could've done a 5k instead with some people, but I want to take it easy on my knee since I hurt it during the hot chocolate 15k) and then we had some time to relax until training began. I had to buy some hand wraps and still need to buy my own boxing gloves and shin guards. Everyone wears shin guards and while my shins are fine right now, they may be aching after a few more days of training.

The session started like every session with 10 minutes of stretching and shaking out the joints/muscles. Then everyone (about 20 people at the gym) split and I was left wondering where do I go? But one of the trainers, Thang (I think is how it's spelled) came up to me and worked with me and some of the other beginners. He made sure our form was correct on jabs, punches, hooks, uppercuts, elbows, knees and kicks. I'm still learning to get these down, but I definitely improved over the day. We shadowboxed and then practiced our accuracy on some pads against one wall. He then worked with each of us individually with a little padwork. After that we practiced on the punching bags and did some more kicks.

Every end of a session ends in a pretty similar fashion: 100 knees to the bag, 100 front kicks and 20 regular kicks. Then they have us do 2 sets of 15 pushups, 2 sets of 40 situps and another stretch session to end the morning session. I really thought it wasn't too bad, but that's because I'm a beginner and was not ready for the afternoon session.

It started off alright, just working on shadowboxing while Thang would come by and help with my form. Then the real fun began. It was time for pad work, and I think they went easy on me for my first time. Thang pushed me hard for 3 or 4 rounds of 3 minutes each, just having me throw various combinations. I was wiped out and we weren't even halfway through the session. I thought there was no way I'd be able to get through this session without limping along. After my padwork he had me go to the bag to continue what I was learning. It was during this part that I slipped when I missed the bag with my knee. I got up right away, but two young thai fighters thought it was pretty funny. So I laughed as well, what else could I do? One gave me a pointer, but I only missed because the bag was swinging and I was tired. Every 3-5 minutes they blow a whistle where you drop and do 10 pushups or situps and then you can get some water. This break lasts a minute or so. I was definitely out of stamina, halfway through the session. But then, miraculously, we switched to technique for the rest of the day where we worked with another student on blocking. Important to learn, but not tiring on the body, you just have to learn to block what they throw. I was so glad for this part, my body was done for the day. Other more experienced students were clinching and sparring in the rings, never full speed, but it looked pretty fun. I'm sure I'll get there by the end of my trip.

It ended with the 50 knees, 100 kicks, pushups, situps, etc. and stretching. It felt so good to be done for the day. I just sat on the steps to the gym, taking it easy and dreading the next day. I sweated like I've never sweat before. I'm not exaggerating when I say every square inch of my clothers were SOAKED in sweat. My thick gym shorts were dripping wet like I just came out of the ocean. The combination of high temperatures and humidity with the session is almost unbearable. But as I write this at 4:15am (still adjusting to time difference I guess), I'm ready for whatever comes my way today. I know the morning session won't be so bad and tomorrow is a day off, and I already need it. Plus John will be visiting at some point today through tomorrow, so I'm looking forward to that as well.

During the day yesterday I did a currency exchange finally and paid for the first month for everything. That included 2 buffet meals per day, but I have to watch that I don't go overboard at these meals even if I'm starving. The food has been very good so far, and very healthy. For example, in the morning I had muesli with banana, guava, pineapple and granola, a couple pineapple/guava filled crepes and a piece of multigrain toast plus soy milk (not to my liking). In the afternoon I had to pay for my meal, but it was just 90 baht ($3) for a plate of glass noodles with spicy chicken salad. It was very good and full of veggies, mung beans and peanuts. I'm not a big veggie person, but I'm sucking it up while here and so far so good. Dinner consisted of some sort of veggie filled omelette, brown rice, a noodle plate and small fried chicken legs. They also had bananas, but I saved one for this morning as I don't have any food in my bungalow yet. That's on the agenda for today, going to a store to pick up some oatmeal and other food I can keep in my bungalow because I need to be eating 5-6 times per day, not 2. But I am excited for all the meals I can try, everything looks pretty good.

As for my training, there is some good news for some sweet relief. According to the veterans of the camp, apparently no one really trains twice a day 6 days per week unless they have a fight coming up. It's very taxing on the body and can cause sickness and injury since your body is wiped out and leaves you susceptible to germs/infection/etc. Before I came here, I was planning on weightlifting a lot to get to my goals, but not sure where I would fit it in. There's no way I can expect good results fitting in weightlifting in between muay Thai sessions. So I plan to weightlift 4 times per week in the afternoons most likely, switching it with some mornings sometimes. It'll help me gain the muscle I'm looking for instead of potentially losing some due to the extreme cardio in muay Thai. So starting Monday, I'll be beginning my weightlifting regimen I had set out to do. Only thing that bothers me a bit is that the gym isn't fully equipped, but I can make do.

Too long of an entry, I'm going to read and then get ready for the morning run.