I thought it would be a great idea to purchase some golf clubs. 2 or 3 weekends ago I went "golfing" with a bunch of buddies. I had just got back from a 3 week trip in the miserable north east cold, and went to Glenn Annie course on a clear blue day with a view of the Pacific. The thing is, I didn't swing a single club. I didn't have clubs, so I paid a $12 fee to be on the course, drove a golf cart for 18 holes and drank a bunch of beer. Honestly, I had a blast. A buddy of mine even complained that I was having more fun for $50 less than him. I smoked a cigar, saw a drive deflect off our buddy's back on the fairway, saw a buddy puke on one of the greens and other entertaining things. There was one thing missing though, and that was me actually playing.

Fast forward to last Friday where I found what look to be "good" clubs for $20 on craigslist. After work I immediately bought them, then on Saturday bought a bag from Play it Again Sports and a putter and glove from Sports Authority. I was officially ready to golf. Except for a I didn't realize how fuckin terrible I am.

I just got back from the driving range. My right thumb has a blister I popped and my left palm is really sore. I bought about 80 balls and didn't make it through but 70. Not one of those 70 "strokes" would have out driven a 12yo girl that has been playing for 6 months, hitting from 30 yards behind me. I was easily better when I was 15 than I am 13 years later. Evidently being bigger has nothing to do with driving the ball. I felt so clueless out there that I couldn't say one thing I did right.

I have no idea if I'm too far from the ball. If the ball is too far forward, or too far back. If my knees are bent enough, or too much. My grip on the club. What angle I should be holding the club. My backswing feels foreign. I whiffed. A ton. And played it off like a practice swing. No less than 20x. I don't know where to strike the ball. Clearly it wasn't too low, as nothing got air. My follow through is like playing air guitar, it feels correct, but could be completely superfluous. Maybe the balls were just bad? Or maybe it was because I averaged 7 holes a year of golf for the past 4 years?

Actually, I think it was the $20 clubs. Yeah that's it. It was the clubs.