Just wanted to make a post on putting things in perspective. I just took a week off to go down to Atlantic City and hang out w/Hokiegreg. Been on a pretty big downer (-30k day doesnt help :-p), and just needed to step away for a bit. It was a great trip and Greg is one of my oldest friends in poker. We came up from the 22s together, and talking to him always helps. He's really level headed and makes sure to acknowledge the benefits he receives from poker, even when he's having a hard time, something I rarely take the time to do. So there I was, today, playing a 100+ game session, and ended +$95. I mean really?? +$100, it literally could have been +$0.01 to me, in my mind there was no difference, it was a winning day for a trivially small amount. But wait, I mean thats not right... it hasnt always been that way, I remember when being +$100 or +$200 was having a really good day, and my i'd tell me gf (wife) about it and be happy and pretty proud. For alot of people, even people I know, friends, some family, etc., $100/day is way more than what they make and they would be thrilled at it, but not me... I can hardly bear the thought of only being +$100, and this whole aspect, my whole outlook on money kind of sickens me in a way. Like I know it's a necessity to be able to detach myself from money to be successful at the stakes I play, and im not overly crazy about losing sight of the value of money IRL (although still far worse than a normal person ;p), but I just wish I was able to respect it a little bit more during times like these.

This whole realization happened when I was driving to a movie tonight. So i drove down to Hooksett (New Hampshire), and passed the toll, and thought about why I always went to Concord and not Manchester/Hooksett (slightly further away but slightly more there). And I think the reason is when I was in highschool and driving around with my friends, going the extra distance, more time, more gas, etc., and also have to pay the toll, were all the reasons we didnt go. Paying the toll, one dollar each way... trying to envision back when that meant enough to literally change all of my plans is pretty hard for me now, but there was a time, when that $2 in toll to go there and back represented 20 minutes of work for me ($6/hr), which is a significant chunk of time considering how miserable I was doing $6/hr work :-p. So obviously I will never be able to look at money like that again, but it can still scale to situation more appropriate to me currently (looking at what plane tickets to buy, taking trips, choosing what car to buy and how maybe making sacrifices on price could benefit me financially, etc.).

Anyways, this is a really weird blog post, and not at all my normal form of blogging, but I just had been thinking about it and wanted to get my thoughts out there :).

Poker, as mentioned, has been pretty 'meh' this month, but I feel pretty good about my play, and really feel like ive been crushing people overall, so just taking it one step at a time. Moved down slightly, and not focusing at all at getting even or recovering or whatever, just taking it from here and going to take it just like it never happened. Obviously im not going to pretend a downswing doesnt happen, that doesnt help my mentality, but in reality, there is no difference on if im -10k for this 30 day period, or if I started my 30 day periods I call months in the middle of the month, etc., so like, im not going to stress about 'getting even for this month', im just going to focus on picking smart games, pushing out volume, and profiting, and in the end thats all we can really do.

Still planning a WSOP post, but i'll save that for later. For other stuff, heres some music / movie talk =]:

Music i've been listening to lately:

B.O.B. - The Adventures of Bobby Ray (album, pretty good, has been good to grind to and some pretty good tracks)

Alexisonfire - Watch Out! / Crisis / 'Old Crows/Young Cardinals' (all 3 albums v good, like this band alot, been listening to these albums just forever now and still doesnt get old while grinding)

and my Grind Song lately has been this (Given to me by SSS ;p): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsxOo9cJ-dE (only got it today, but can tell i'll prolly use it for a while, just good background noise while im playing sessions

Movies:

Robin Hood - Meh, it was OK, if they would have called it Robin Hood - The Prequel , I would have liked it a ton, but I spent the whole movie wondering when the @!)!@ robin hood was gonna steal/give , so the pace was really weird, if I had to rewatch it now knowing it was just the set up another movie, i'd enjoy it alot, but at the time it bugged me the whole way through wondering why there had been no 'robin-hood-ness' yet and there was only 30 minutes left. Biggest complaint though is he uses a sword for like 80% of the movie. If I had to rate it i'd give it a 8.0 / 10

Iron Man 2 - It was OK, people told me it was awful... it wasnt, it was entertaining, albeit not amazing, and I dont see why someone would REALLY NOT enjoy this movie or anything, just pretty std., prolly gets like an 8.2 / 10

American History X - I had never seen it, suchh a good movie, and Edward Norton is such a beast in it, expected nothing from it except a curb stomping scene, and REALLY liked it.

American Psycho - Also had never seen it, just like... wtf, it wasnt bad, but it def. wasnt good, not sure if this movie was supposed to be great or not, but it def. wasnt, I prolly wouldnt re-watch.

Greenstreet Hooligans - rewatched it, still enjoyed it, alot of people dont know about this movie, but def. decent, I liked it before, and liked it on the rewatch

Tropa de elite - Foreign film (in portugese, placed in Rio / Brazil) obv watched w/subtitled because dubbing is a joke and refuse to watch anything dubbed, just embarassing ;p. But v v v good movie, totally unexpected, a friend told me it was good, watched it, and liked it a ton.

Braveheart - Rewatched, classic, obv an awsome film, but def. seemed to me this time rewatching it that the story moved a bit quick in some spots, well... quick for a 3 hr movie I guess ;p, but still, im not sure if recently plot-development has just gotten alot better in films, or if its cause i've been watching a ton of TV series which gives them more time to set it up, but it def. stood out to me. Regardless, epic film, A+ =]

Zombieland - Liked it, not as good 2nd time through, def. wont live up to Dawn of the Dead / 28 days later and the like, but it wasnt really supposed to, it's a good comedy in a zombie setting, def. a decent movie and considering how bad some zombie movies are, this is still pretty high up there for them.

wow... i've watched a ton of movies recently, I hadnt really noticed ;-p. Anyways, like I said, my blog is kind of molded by you guys, so leave comments as much as possible and let me know thoughts (less of the first part ranting? Less/more poker? no more movies/music? :( ) lemme know! Hope May is going well for everyone, and hopefully see some of you guys out in Vegas for the WSOP,

-Primo