So this is my 5th year now as a pro and I have to say I still have such trouble understanding how and why this game works the way it does.

I hadn't won anything in weeks. It isn't that uncommon for that to happen though. My whole career I've pretty much treaded water, breaking even, breaking even, lose a little, win a little, more breaking even... Then out of no where I just have like a huge day or string of days and literally 75% of my profit has to have come from specifically these upswings. Like in January when I came up 50k in like 2 weeks.

I haven't been in particularly good financial shape the last couple months, and it was actually getting to the point that I was starting to consider taking a staking offer. Somehow though, two 12 hour sessions later and I'm up 13k -- from just playing 2/4NL and $100 HU SNG's. Obviously 13k isn't that much money in the big scheme of things, I just find it so odd that this type of thing happens again and again. I was +3k from the SNG's so 10k @ 2/4 that's 25 buy ins. Maybe this is how it works for everybody, I just don't really get it. It gets really depressing during those down times when nothing is happening, but these upswings always seem to make me feel better. The more I think about it though, the more irritated I am about how I feel because I shouldn't be letting how I'm running at poker dictate how I'm feeling on a day to day basis. It's something I've pretty much always struggled with, and I don't see that stopping until I can find balance in my day to day life. That balance always seems to elude me though.

Guess I should be back at 5/10 soon.